maybe, maybe..
maybe this will be the first thing in my life that i had ever regret for life
i've regretted things in my life, but i've never regretted them for the whole of my life..
but this looks like something that i will regret for the rest of my whole life
i dont want.. but, it serve me right..
people says 'fate and destiny is decided my your own very hands, not by god'
now, i believed that..
but was i too late for that?
i dont know

but i saw the eyes, i saw the look in those eyes, the way it could have felt..
i could see, because i experience that kind of feeling before..
the looks, and those looks..

now im lost..
lost in the ocean of hell, i dont think i could ever get up
i sinked too deep into the ocean
but i will still stick to what i thought
i will still determine on
no matter what, if i ever would have to make a choice, i would make sure i dont become the extra calafei
but till then, i will still stick to what i've said
i will

here i am, i've return home from yet another day in loft
went to loft ytd for steamboat, to bid farewell to melicia for her attachment trip to England
then went to airport to send her off into the gates


this was taken during Rondeau XXIV

to my dearest retired treasurer,
take care and have a safe journey!! :)
you will be missed, and i will do my job well :)

ok, i dont think i could come out with a topic to talk about in my post now
so, i shall end my post her
tata~~

i hope, i hope..
but saying my hearts out here wouldnt be a good idea
there, i shall find a place to throw out my thoughts..

since then, i think i've lost something important in my life, and here i am
struggling to live without it
i realised i cant
and i dont think any humans can live without it too..